Sunday, 4 April 2010

Chocolate or Church?

Today I went to Church. This is not unusual for a Christian on one of the most important days in the calendar, that is a given, what is strange (for me at least) is that I chose to go to Church rather than eat chocolate after a thirteen week extended lent, where I gave up..........chocolate!

I am not going to lie and say that Lent was easy - it wasn't, but then again that is the point - what is gained by giving up that which we will not miss? If that is the case then I have had a time of fasting from Brussel Sprouts, ginger, cinnamon, tripe...you get the picture! So when embarking on Lent this year I decided to extend it. I wanted a constant reminder of Jesus in my life. I decided that this year would be the year that I would put ALL my faith in Jesus, not just a little or 90%, but 100%. As ever this is a work in progress, but extending Lent was a good start.

Now I do not need chocolate, I am fortunate enough to have more food than I need available to me, but I do like it. I find that at times it is a good pick-me-up emotionally and physically. Without that I HAD to rely on God for my emotional and physical caffine shot. This has proved more joyous than I can imagine, as well as being a constant reminder of Jesus and His sacrifice for me.

So today I had a choice - Chocolate or Church. In the final weeks of my Lent I had looked forward to today as a break in my fast. I had looked forward, and spoke at length, about my plans to sit and gorge myself on chocolate for the first hour of my day. How I looked forward to waking this morning!! BUT, before I fell to sleep last night I felt God telling me to go to Church in the morning. I was not impressed...that did not fit in with my chocolate plans! So I decided (quite foolishly) to bargain with God and said 'I will not put my alarm on, if I am meant to go to Church then, God, you will wake me in time'. Needless to say that God took on the plans and woke me up at 7.30 - a full three hours before Church!

Even then I thought well, I need more sleep so I will go back to sleep and will wake up in good time if God wishes me to (!!). I was awake at 9.20 on the dot and could not sleep again...even then I wasn't sure whether I had the energy to get up or whether I should languish in bed a little longer. I was at the point of deciding that I should stay and ignore God's heart that I should go to Church, when I heard the words of Amazing Grace. The words that struck me were the lines:

T'was Grace that taught my heart to fear.
And Grace, my fears relieved.
How precious did that Grace appear
The hour I first believed.

I was reminded of the lightness in my soul when I first came to Christ and how I feel when connected with God - I feel that nothing can touch me and hurt me, my heart is full to overflowing. I knew then that I didn't HAVE to go to Church but that I WANTED to. I wanted to sing with my fellow believers, I wanted to be washed with the Holy Spirit, I wanted to show God how much I love Him and how thankful I am to His Son that He would die for me and my sins - that I could be loved so much.

So I decided that I should be putting Jesus first, that I should start the day with Him. Chocolate could wait - after all it seemed somewhat insignificant in the grand scheme of things.

Happy Easter everyone! Christ is Risen...how AMAZING is that?